Cartwheels vs. Split Leaps
Welcome to our column written by Managing Editor Caitlyn Mae Araña, called Catching Up With Caitlyn. Through letters, she addresses the trials and tribulations that come with learning and growing as a 20-something.
This semester, she will be focusing on one particular narrative that has impacted her over the years, although not all articles will be about this one situation. So, tune in for your weekly dose of drama and strap in ladies and gents… Nothing is off limits here.
Dear Jacob*,
Let’s move on to the age-old tale where you dated one of my best friends. Okay, so maybe it didn’t go exactly like that. You didn’t date her to spite me or anything. I think you genuinely did like her, the same way that she genuinely liked you—and she had for a long time. She liked you before I even thought I had feelings for you, not that I knew that when we got together. But, I just wish you two went about it a different way.
Tatiana* and I used to hate each other for no reason other than the fact that she was very into sports as a kid, and I was very into fashion. We even competed one day to switch personalities, and essentially prove absolutely nothing to no one. We reached common ground when we both joined the cheerleading team in the second grade where she did the cartwheels, and I did the split leaps. Then suddenly, in fourth grade, we were best friends.
I remember walking through the park with her during our sophomore year of high school, and her eyes were glued to her phone and your name labeled on every notification. You had just been through some traumatic event that I don’t entirely recall, but regardless, she helped you during a time when you needed someone. When I asked her if you two were together, she denied it, which was fine. Maybe you two really weren’t together at that time. But it felt like a lie.
You two, over the next few days or weeks, got closer and closer. I didn’t mind it. I was over you. We had both moved on. After all, I had just gotten out of a relationship with someone after choosing him over you (still one of the worst decisions I’ve ever made), and I was also kind of getting into something new. It didn’t dawn on me that it maybe could be wrong that my ex-boyfriend and one of my best friends were dating, or getting close, or whatever you would call it. And, maybe it’s not wrong. Still, that wasn’t the point.
In order to fully understand the story, you must first understand the breakdown of this friend group. The group was Tatiana and our other friend, Ella*, who were a pair of best friends, and then me and Alyssa, a second pair of best friends. Together, along with another friend, Ricky*, we made up an entire best friend group—together since middle school.
Let’s go back to mid-2015. Alyssa’s Sweet 16 was coming up some time in December. For months leading up to it, her court (including our whole friend group) would meet up and practice the routine that we would be performing. While these normally took place in the auditorium of a school, on this day, it took place at the home of one of the court members. The first time Tatiana and Ella spoke to me that day, I knew that something was off. Tatiana wouldn’t stop talking about you, and I just had a strange feeling about how the day was going to play out. And somehow, I knew that it had something to do with you.
After practice, Tatiana and Ella called me into the house. I remember walking in with extreme caution, feeling as if I were walking straight into a trap. It felt like it was them against me. Ella had her phone pointed at me. It looked as if she were recording me. I looked at her awkwardly, looking around to see if I could find any sign of what was to come. There was nothing. I truly thought this was either going to be terrible news, or that they were going to surprise me with a thoughtful gift. Let me just say… there was no gift.
Instead, Tatiana blurted out that you two were together. For an instant, I felt uneasy, but with Ella pointing her phone at me, I also felt pressed for a reaction. Naturally, I jumped up and down with happiness. Happy that you two were together? Happy that I ended up being right? I wasn’t sure what I was happy about, but I felt extremely uncomfortable, and from the shocked looks on their faces, I could tell that they were uncomfortable as well.
Following that day, I had talked about this, mostly with Alyssa and her mom, who informed me that what happened was, in fact, incredibly messed up. They claimed that I should’ve been livid. But it wasn’t until my cousin brought up the video of my reaction to me, asking me about it, that I got upset. It wasn’t until I was face-to-face with the same video of my reaction that was sent to my cousin. That was when I got upset. I felt mocked and embarrassed and disappointed. After all, these were supposed to be my best friends. You and I were supposed to be doing well.
When I confronted both Tatiana and Ella about it, they had confessed that they only did it because you had told them that I cheated on you. That lie that I told you… that attempt at an exciting relationship? It came back to fully bite me in my ass.
Truthfully, I thought you knew that I had lied about it. You didn’t, and all I can remember is needing to constantly explain that I never cheated on you. I never did. I never would. And that was all there was to it. You told her that you loved her, and a week or so after that, you two broke up. I’m not going to get into the nitty gritty of what happened between you two, because it’s not the point. The point is how we got to where we are now. But, we’ve got a long way until then.
Only Love,
Caitlyn Mae
*Names have been changed to maintain integrity.